Thursday, November 14, 2013

Any Critics?

Any Critics?

The events of the past weekend have stirred up a lot of emotions and deep thought in me.  To the point that I just had to get it out!  It has been consuming me to tears and lack of sleep.  It is a subject that I am passionate about to my very core!   I am talking about how critical we are of one another.  ABOUT EVERYTHING!!!!  It seems everything we do these days is a competition in some way.  All of us scrambling to see if we can “one up” the other.  To the point that I believe we have lost ourselves completely.  We live in a world where it seems very few dare to stand out and be who they truly are.    Now...I get that nobody likes criticism...that’s my very point!  WHY do we do to each other, the very thing we despise that people do to us?  Think about it.  I have been!   So I’m going to play a little game with you...It’s called “Imagine a world”.  

Lets all of us imagine a world where it was admired and respected to be ones true self.  To express ones self in its purest form in every way.  Think of how many artists there would be, and how different their work would look like from one another.  How different singers would sing or write music if they just did what ever they wanted and felt, knowing there were no critics.  How different would people act?  How different would you dress or even cut your hair if you had no worries about what people were going to say?  How different would your personality be?  Would you even like different music?  Different food?  How many of us out there are always seeking the approval of others in everything we do?   And YES...I mean EVERYTHING!  I would dare say ninety percent or more of us don’t have a clue who we truly are inside,  and even if we did, we are too afraid to show it because of the brutal criticism that is all around us.  Look at Facebook and Twitter and all the other social media outlets where people seem like they are screaming at the top of their lungs....”Validate me!!!!!  PLEASE!!!”  I’m sure there is someone critiquing my grammer as they are reading this very post.  haha.  

   Imagine having NO FEAR of what others thought.  Imagine how creative you would dare to be if you didn’t care about opinions.  People wouldn’t be out there trying to “one up” each other.  Instead....their goal would be to be themselves, and to truly admire others for doing the same!  And if people liked it, great....if not....that was great too!  Imagine that we all had respect for each other no matter what our title, talents, education or skills were!  How wonderful would that be!   We as people are missing out on so much because we do this to each other!   It is my prayer that we all try a little harder to be brave and unique and allow others that same freedom.  Quit judging and critiquing the hell out of each other and start to love and support each other!  We are all equal.  Nobody is better than the other.  Today I am going to be the first to make sure “I” am how i’d like others to be!  Together we can be better and make this world a better place!

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

I wont give up!

Oh boy has this ever been a very challenging past few days.   I offered to help a very dear friend of mine who I love so much.  First I'll start by telling a little of her story.  Out of respect I am not going to mention her name.   My sweet friend has always been such a compassionate, loving, giving person.  The kind you don't meet every day.  She would do, and always did, anything for anyone.  Never putting her needs or wants before anyone else.  She was so beautiful inside and out.
      She married a man after High school who I watched over the past 20 years slowly emotionally abuse her into the ground until she had nothing left.  She finally got away from him, but after 20 years of abuse,  she was left empty.  She had no self esteem,  no confidence,  no drive to get better.
            She found a man who she thought loved her.  She fell head over heals for him and again was willing to do anything for him.  The problem was, that this man was a drug addict.  And he showed her everything he knew.  Now two years later,  he is in jail and my sweet friend is homeless and severely addicted to drugs.  
I offered her a place to stay at my house for a few days.  3 to be exact.   I watched her sleep,  cry,  go into crazy tantrums,  tell me she wanted to go back to her drug family,  and watched her go through physical agony  just to name a few things.   The friend I knew was gone.  Every once in a while I'd see a little light in her eyes of what might be a little of her left still deep inside.  At least that was what I was hoping for.
I myself know how hard it is because I once suffered from substance abuse.  It breaks my heart to watch her suffer and crave more and more of what is making her suffer so badly.  That is why drugs are so evil.  How can you crave something you hate so much.  You can see it destroying you and stripping away all of the goodness in you.  You cry because you hate it so bad, yet you can't even sleep because you want and need more.
I learned over those days that my deep love for her is not enough to save her.  I already knew that in my heart but I still  struggled  not to take it personally because I was always able to help her,  but this was much bigger than me.   She promised me she had none on her and I wanted to believe her.  She said she was "done" and again I wanted to believe her.  "She"  wanted to believe her!!                   Everything that comes out of a drug addicts mouth is a lie.  That is the first rule to remember when taking care of an addict.  Even when that addict is one of your best friends.
Anyway......we are trying to find her a treatment center so she can have a chance.  She deserves it.  She would never give up on any of us if the tables were turned.  I know that with all my heart.  So my dear friend....just know that I will do everything I can to get you back and help you.  Even if you hate me for it.  I love you....I wont give up on you!  This song is for you.